(Psalm 22: 1-6)
My plans did not work out, and I felt as though I'd fallen flat on my face. I'd been the one praying, and fasting... Yet, it seemed as though God had overlooked me and forgotten that I was in need of a blessing. Nothing was going my way, and I could not take that. My God! I'm supposed to be in New York living in the big city, fulfilling the internship of my dreams. I felt like He'd put the dream at the very tip of my fingers and snatched it away. NOTHING was going my way.
In the midst of my anger I began to feel guilty for being mad at Him. Then I remembered how David must have felt when he asked God "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" in Psalm 22. David was greatly favored in God's eyesight, and he still found himself blinded by his anger towards Him. But as I continued to read Psalm 22, in verses 22-31 I find David rejoicing and praising God. David had a moment of insecurity and doubt, he complained to God, but then he realized exactly who he served.
So I had a decision to make. Either I was going to be angry with God and stand in offense because of what was happening...or I could trust Him anyway, and praise Him despite my emotions. While kneeling there in my anger, somehow I still felt God's presence. He was listening to me, as I was honest with both Him and myself. I even recalled in Matthew 27 that Jesus spoke the same words as David. "And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? That is to say, "My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken Me?" (Matthew 27:46).
The flesh causes bouts of doubt and pure unbelief.When we are angry we place a blockade between ourselves and God, and so we must let go of our pride and allow Him back in. The last thing that we want is a distancing between ourselves and someone we love... Further more, someone that loves US. We get angry, and God knows this, so He tells His people to "Anger, but sin not" (Ephesians 4:26). We are very human, and our flesh fights our spirit man daily. But we must allow ourselves to be submerged in faith, and trust God to ease the winds when the waves get too high. You will not be shaken by storms, and your feet are steady. God bless you! Love you!